Hello and thank you for visiting my website.
The first sentence in the book The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck is “Life is difficult”. Truer words have never been spoken. I know this personally and professionally. However, there is hope. I commend you for your willingness to try and have a more peaceful and contented life. It CAN be better.
“I took a weight to Vicki that I had been carrying around a long time. She listened so patiently and compassionately, and then gave me resources and tools that let me finally set the weight down. This is not just fluff or schmaltz for the website. I am a different person: happier, more fulfilled, more confident, and more at peace. Don’t doubt that you can be, too. Thank you, Vicki, from the bottom of my heart.”
You have taken the first step. Please know that this takes courage and is not a weakness.
Are you struggling with self-worth, relationship problems, feelings of overwhelm, loneliness, or questions about the meaning of life and your purpose? Are you grieving a loss and struggling to come to terms with it? Are you aging and feeling the passage of time and the changes that come with that? These are all issues that I have experienced firsthand, as well. As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Grief Therapist who has been doing this work since 2003, I have the experience and education to help you navigate these difficult life challenges.
The ideal client for me is one who is introspective and self-reflective, a person who is motivated to learn and grow. Pain, loss, and stress are a part of life. We all want to avoid these things, to make them go away. What I have learned, however, is that trying to avoid our pain does not work. It’s learning how to sit with it, to learn, and to receive the messages that it is bringing. Sometimes it means we must make changes in our lives. Are there things we need to be doing differently? What are our values and are we living in alignment with them?
My approach is to offer suggestions of things to do differently, of new ways of exploring yourself and your life, of books or articles to read, or perhaps a writing exercise. It is not the 50 minutes you spend with me that will change your life. It is what you do in between sessions. Therapy can be painful and requires work. There are usually no quick fixes.
I also believe that “good” therapy is “conversational”. We can explore together what you are learning and talk about questions you may have. I can help you see aspects of yourself that you may not see.
I see my job as part teacher, part therapist, and part fellow traveler on this journey. I do not have all the answers as I am also human. I am where I am because I have done my own work to learn and to grow.
People describe me as authentic, down-to-earth, kind, compassionate, wise, calm, and empowering. My practice is dedicated to helping clients lead calm and peaceful lives while also empowering and inspiring them. If you are motivated to make changes and to look inward; to learn and to grow, I am the right therapist for you and would be honored to help you on your path.
If you are experiencing any of these issues, I can help:
Anxiety
Feelings of low self-worth
Relationship issues
Life transitions
Grieving a loss
Trouble with aging
Trouble asserting your needs
In addition to the above issues, I specialize in:
Helping Highly Sensitive People (persons who identify as having a trait scientifically known as a Sensory-Processing Sensitivity) learn to accept their trait and be able to navigate life in a different and better way. As an HSP myself, I understand the challenges that come with having this normal temperament. We often feel a lot of shame as HSPs. I want to eliminate this. Our brains are different. We were born this way. It is not a weakness or character flaw. However, in our culture is not embraced nor understood. We are unique. I believe this is a good thing. We have a lot we can offer to our society and the world. Please see www.HSPerson.com to learn more about this trait. And then please return to my website to learn how I can help.
If you answer “yes” to most of these questions, you may be a Highly Sensitive Person.
Do you get overwhelmed when you have a lot to do in a short amount of time?
Have you always felt different or flawed?
Do you experience emotions on a deeper level than other people you know?
Do you startle easily or find loud noises and chaotic environments difficult?
Do you seem to need more "downtime" than others?
Are you deeply moved by the arts or music?
Do you have a special connection with animals or nature?
Vicki L. Quarles, LCSW, GC-C
Helping people who are aging and/or grieving a loss. I n addition to being a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, I am also a Certified Grief Counselor with the American Institute of Health Care Professionals and have experienced a significant amount of change, death, and loss in my life, and continue to do so. As a Baby Boomer, I understand the issues of aging and life changes. Change means loss and that comes in many forms: retirement, moving, divorce/relationship endings, physical challenges, and death of spouses/partners, parents, siblings, children, friends, and pets. Grief accompanies loss, but this is an issue that is taboo in our society. We are often not “allowed” to grieve in appropriate ways or time frames. My mission is to educate people about what is normal grief, help them heal, and then learn how to integrate the loss into their lives.
Calm Life Counseling: I AM ONE OF “US”
I, too, am a Highly Sensitive Person. I learned this about myself in 2008.
I believe in taking what I have learned and helping other people. It’s important to find meaning in the painful events in life.
“Learn from the past, live in the present, and plan for the future. ”
“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”
“Healing doesn’t mean the damage never existed. It means the damage no longer controls our lives.”
Professional credentials, too
I have the life experience AND professional education to help you gain some peace and stability. After experiencing a lifetime of depression and loss, I went through counseling in my late thirties and was then able to attend graduate school at the age of 40.
Safe and secure
Calm Life Counseling is available to adults of any race, ethnicity, gender expression, sexual orientation, socioeconomic background, religion, or ability.
Maintaining my clients’ confidentiality is of upmost importance to me.
“The purpose of psychotherapy is to set people free.”